On a More Serious Note…

First off you may have noticed a few changes around the site. Chandler’s gone and changed the theme and layout on me again, but it does look a bit better, so I’ll forgive him this time. Also we’ve let a few more people into our fold as contributing writers, so hopefully we’ll see some interesting new posts and fresh ideas from them!

And yes, there is a very specific reason why I haven’t written a single blog post in over a month (trust me, I’ve been thinking up millions).

I was involved in a car accident, and if you want the details, read on my friend…

On the morning of Thursday March 18th, I was driving down a single lane highway on my way to work. It had rained a bit the night before and there were a few icy patches on the road here and there. I happened to go over one of these patches and completely lose control of my vehicle. My car swerved quickly into oncoming traffic, and more specifically, the path of a small SUV. The driver of the SUV realized what was about to happen and he slammed on his breaks, but it was too late. His brakes locked up and he also lost control of his vehicle. I realized that we were going to collide, at full highway speeds, and there remained nothing I could do to prevent it. I’m not sure if you’ve ever experienced a feeling like that but let me tell you – it’s the sickest feeling in the world.

The crash was literally deafening. I sat in my car for maybe a minute while I regained my hearing and the full extent of what had just happened sunk in. The full front of my car had collided with the driver’s side of the front of the SUV. My car did a 90 degree pivot, covering up both lanes of the highway, while the SUV continued 20 meters into the ditch.

This is what remains of my Suzuki Swift:

To say the least, I am thankful for seat belts and airbags. My face hit the airbag so hard it gave me a nose bleed. Surprisingly though, I didn’t get whiplash. In fact I didn’t seem very damaged at all. There was a large cut in my leg but that seemed to be the worst of it.

I looked back at the SUV and from my angle I couldn’t tell if anyone was moving inside. That was really frightening. I jumped out of my smashed window and ran towards the SUV. I yelled “Are you OK?” as i approached the vehicle. The driver screamed back, obviously in quite a bit of pain, “No, my leg is broken!”. A women came out of the passenger side and tried to open his door. It was smashed shut. I didn’t know what I could or even what I should do, so I sat down in the snow.

It couldn’t have been more than a minute until a man stopped, put me in his truck, and called 911. Within another half an hour the paramedics had arrived and cut the driver from his SUV. We rode to the hospital in the same ambulance and even though he was quite obviously in much worse shape than I was, the other driver spent the ride to the hospital asking me if I was ok.

I never enjoy going to the hospital, in fact I avoid it if at all possible, but I am very thankful for the work paramedics, doctors and nurses do. I spent about 7 or 8 hours in the hospital that day and I’m also very thankful for my friends and family who came to see me, it really makes hospitals that much more bearable.

In the end my injuries were pretty minor. I had 15 stitches put in my knee, a cast over my left arm because I fractured my thumb, and some general bruising. It also turns out that there were 4 occupants of the other vehicle. The drive and his wife, and a senior couple in the back. The driver’s left leg was broken in two places as was his right ankle. He had emergency surgery that night and he will be unable to walk for 3 months, but he will be ok. His wife had one cracked rib and the seniors each had a few bruises. I couldn’t be more thankful that everyone is ok. Things could have been much worse, if any one of a number of variables had changed – any one of us, or all of us, would be dead.

And that’s what a lot of people have been telling me – You should be dead. Maybe they are right, maybe I did cheat death. But I’m glad I didn’t die. I like to think I’ve got quite a bit more living left in me.

People also keep asking me if I have a new found respect for life. Not really, I’ve always respected life. If anything I have a new found respect for airbags and paramedics. I’m not saying it hasn’t changed my life. Everything I experience changes my life in one way or another. I just feel that you can’t give in until you are ACTUALLY dead. If you’re given another shot at life, you take it and you keep on living.  Some of my friends are surprised by how traumatized I’m not, but I think it’s this philosophy that keeps me this way.  I’m still here, I’m still Jordan Mann, I’m still thankful for what I’ve got, and I’m still going to take every possible opportunity I have to test jokes on you.

Case in point:

Stay classy guys,

– Jordan A. Mann

PS: Sorry about the dark tone of this post. I’ll think up something really funny next, I swear!